


Smoke Breaks

by spacey_ethan



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Depressed Tyler Joseph, Depression, Friends to Lovers, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Josh Dun & Tyler Joseph Are Best Friends, Josh Dun is a Sweetheart, M/M, My First Fanfic, Panic Attacks, Recreational Drug Use, Sad Tyler Joseph, Schizophrenia, Self-Harm, Smoking, To Be Continued, Underage Smoking, Work In Progress, its cigarettes yall
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-04
Updated: 2019-04-05
Packaged: 2020-01-04 13:03:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,312
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18344237
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spacey_ethan/pseuds/spacey_ethan
Summary: Warnings; Self Hate/Harm, Triggering thoughts, Suicidal thoughts,Tyler needs a break from it all, but Josh is worried about him.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> * Stay Safe ! *

Tyler stared up at the orange atmosphere, bringing a white tobacco stick to his lips. His back slumped against the popcorn textured drywall in the back of the school. He let his lashes part, his eyes felt so dizzy. It was the dizzy that felt like he was on the verge of falling asleep, but fighting it. He exhaled a puff of smoke into the air around him, ignoring the sound of the back door swinging open. Tyler didn’t pick up smoking on purpose, It just sort of happened. When Zack would have his friends over, they would push and shove him into joining in on their smoke breaks. It spiraled down hill from there, one pack at a time.

“Hey” Josh greeted simply, his tone hadn’t given off any red flags, but his expression said otherwise. Tyler cocked his head at his friend, his bare arm didn’t catch his eye until Josh stepped forward gently. He tensed up, the ash from his cigarette slipping to the floor forgotten.

“Tyler..?”

Shit. Josh had saw something, Josh saw something and Tyler knew exactly what that something was.

“I- wait.” Tyler stuttered out, dropping his smoke below his feet. He could almost feel josh’s eyes scoping out his arms. It was disgusting. To be pulled apart like this, especially while he was meant to be having a nice smoke with his friend.

Josh gently took ahold of the eldest’s covered wrist, taking care while lifting the fabric. He had to conceal a gentle gasp by pressing his lips together, “Did.. Did you do all this to yourself? Tyler’s sleeves were his protectors, his guards, the only real control he had. And to have that violently ripped away stung Tyler in the worst possible way. He refused to meet his classmates gaze. It burned his skin like fire.

“Answer me-“

“yes..”

It came out more like a whisper, he felt his breath start to pick up. He absolutely couldn't stand confrontation, so he did what every he could to get out if it. Josh’s thumb rubbed a gentle circle into his wrist, it was the only empty spot on his arms. It felt weird but, comforting. Tyler pulled his arms away. Absentmindedly tugging his sleeve down his slim arms.

“I’m sorry.. I’m so- I.. Did I do this to you?”

“Not exactly.. I- I’m just.. I’m just as fucked up as you expect someone like me to be. I hear things inside my ears.. I see things just as bad .. and I am NOT someone who deserves an apology” Tyler snapped, his hands began to quiver. Panic. Panic.

Josh lifted his hands awkwardly to touch Tyler, only to have him flinch away from him. Josh watched the boy’s shaking hands wrap around his now fast moving chest.

“Fuck.. Wait. Sit down. Can I touch you?”

“Yeah Yeah”

Josh gently grabbed his classmates shoulders, he did his best to work him down onto the grass but nearly fell in the process. Josh sat down next to him, concern lacing every inch of his face.

“Tyler.. Are you with me? Hey uhm.. Can- Can you try to breathe for me please?”

The boy shook his head no, it wasn’t long before huge sobs erupted from his lungs. It hurt Josh to know he had been in this place so many times. It was his last year.. this has to have happened to him before. He’s been talked down to before.

Josh looked around them for a second unsure of how to handle this..

“I-I’m.. I’m so sorry I’m sorry Josh I-“ Tyler sobbed into his crossed legs, his arms still tightly wrapped around his small chest.

“Hey.. Hey No. You dont apologize for something that you know isn’t your fault. Tyler can you look at me please?”

Tyler’s head slowly lifted. His chocolate eyes were red and puffy, Tyler looked so fragile and upset, it broke josh’s heart.

“Breathe.. breathe Ty”


	2. Happy trails

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Josh tries to help the best he can and Tyler is grateful

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> * Stay Safe ! *

 

 “1.. 2.. 3.. Hold... You’re doing so good Tyler.”

 

Tyler slowly untangled himself from the tight grip he had on his chest, his eye lids shutting to focus on breathing.

 

His shaky hands gripped his knees to help keep myself from floating. He began to dispel all the air he was holding in, feeling his lungs start to loosen up. And Tyler always thought being told to breathe was stupid, he felt like he could do better things with his time. But fuck did that shit work.

 

After a few more deep breathes, the boy finally spoke up.

 

“uhm.. Thank you.. I didn’t know I needed that until It happened” Tyler let his lips curl into a unsure smile, Josh returned with a gentle grin.

 

“Hey, you dont have to thank me okay? I made a promise I’m going to be here for you when you need it, and you needed it. No backsies”

 

Tyler laughed at that, Josh always knew what to say and when to say it, No matter how stupid or how inspirational. It always made Tyler so grateful to have him as a friend.

 

After a second of comfortable silence, Tyler began to dig his hand into his back pocket, sighing when he realized his phone was in his back.

 

“What time do you think it is? I’m to lazy to get up”

 

“Probably three or something like that.. Do you need a ride? I’d be happy to take you”

 

“Yeah.. yeah, that would be great”

 

•••••••

 

“Tyler, I gotta stupid question” Josh hummed out of the blue, though it was a normal opener for the two, but It still managed to catch Tyler off guard every now and again.

 

The brunette eyed the younger’s hands that sat firmly at ten and two, Tyler remembered sitting in the car with Josh the first week of him getting his licenses. They joked about whose insurance they were going to use for when they inevitably crash. They ended up safe and with a miner scratch to the already beat up car door. He finally snapped out if it at the sight of josh’s fingers anxiously tapping.

 

“Oh, yeah of course sorry”

 

 

“Well mom isn’t going to be home to tonight, she got caught up in work and I’m pretty sure everyone else in the house is taking advantage of that too. I wanted to know if you could maybe spend the night? We can play Xbox and order a shitty pizza,” Josh chuckled. His fingers kept a rhythm on the steering wheel, It was calming and relaxed with the soft roaring of Death cab for cutie playing through the speakers.

 

Tyler lifted his head to look up at Josh.

 

He weighed his options, he knew after an attack like he just had he was going to need some rest. But at the same time he knew he needed to not be alone right now.

 

“That sounds perfect, I’m down”

 

 

Tyler chuckled at his best friend’s change in posture, he was so amazed by Josh’s little involuntarily movements. It was always little things. But if you knew Josh, you would know he itches his nose when he’s thinking really hard. Or he blinks a lot when he’s nervous. They were stupid things, but Tyler noticed them.

 

It wasn’t long until the two arrived at Josh’s place, It was a short drive from the school anyways. He normally took his car to school when he would carpool Tyler, which may happen more frequently then he would like to admit.

 

“Get your stuff you shit” Tyler laughed, unlocking his side of the car. He clumsily followed Josh in unbuckling himself from the car, gathering his stuff the best he could in the process.

Hopping out of the car was some what of a challenge but he managed.

 

“Welcome to my lovely abode!” Josh announced happily. Tyler’s laughter echoed on the pourch, “Wait til we get inside you dork”


End file.
